I hope no.2

& I finally realized that no matter how much I rebuild myself after I'm knocked down, I'll never be enough to make you happy. 

And that's ok. I just want to be enough for me again. 

But I don't wish for you to be sad & i'd never hope for you to be alone. 

I hope you meet a girl who loves you as much as I have. 

I hope she treats you nice & never makes you sacrifice. 

I hope you brush her hair, too, and tell her she's the most beautiful girl you've ever seen. I hope you mean it. 

& I hope, that one night at 2 a.m., when you're holding her hands & promising her every single someday you ever promised me, you'll look into her sparking eyes & see a glint of mine, simple & brown. 

I hope a lump will grow in your throat as every "I love you" you gave to me becomes hers. I hope you'll remember the first time I nervously said those three words to you, and how happy we were that night in July. You & me. I hope you tell her everyday. 

I hope you'll never give her a reason to be jealous of anyone else, and i hope she never wonders if she comes first. I hope for every night I've cried myself to sleep, clinging to your old tshirt, she'll have you to hold onto instead. And I hope when it rains from time to time, you might miss me... that I won't become an ordinary memory, gathering dust in the bottom of the closet.

And I hope that the girl you love will have one reason for every star in the night sky to believe each promise that lingers on your perfect lips. 

And blue eyes, I hope you'll take her anywhere she wants to go. 

Because for so long, you were my entire world.

And lastly, I hope that someday, someone will look at me the way you'll look at her. 

The way I hoped you would've looked at me.

I hope.