about yesterday

my life has been a series of events going against the things I thought I had planned

to some, it may look as if I'm clumsily trying to contain a monsoon in a jar

and maybe I am 

maybe I'm just chasing the stars 

& maybe I'm a little backwards and flipped upside down 

but they aren't seeing the view from my window 

that window, I crashed trough it a long time ago

and fell free

I rarely land on my feet 

but I don't mind the grass stains 

so here I am.

& from where I'm standing now, 

there are no roadsigns

no next step 

no get out of jail free card

just one day at a time 

      over 

       and 

        over

until I've found my way

doing what I've always done 

laughing hard

& listening to music by people who've been there

learning from the mistakes 

and making more, but differently this time 

praying everyday for a little guidance

& writing about it all at the end of the day

I have absolutely no idea where it is that I'm going
but I know where I'm from
and the people who've always loved me
will always be home
            &

 I'm getting there

to wherever my place in this world is 

but until I find it,

I'm living 

and nothing has ever been so beautiful

       Here I am. 
      In all of my messy, beautiful chaos. 
     Here I am.