"see you soon."

 I cried & cried & cried 

I cried until my memory was flooded with the lingering taste of his lips & the sound of his honest laughter  

I cried the whole way home 

& when I closed my door & fell on my bed I let the tears roll again, only this time, I held his shirt to my chest. 

It smells like him, and somehow that makes my heart swell & ache & soar all at the same time. 

I took out a picture of the two of us. 

ran my finger over his smile & reopened the piece of my mind that has memorized the softness of his cheeks, careful to savor the fresh feeling, not to let it all escape. 

It stings to know he was just here, holding my hand everywhere we went, kissing my cheeks & whispering I love you. 

& that right now, at this moment, he's somewhere in the sky so far from me. 

But then I looked at his eyes. His striking blue eyes. & I took a deep breath. 

& I was ok. 

It hurts, gosh it hurts so much my chest feels as if it might collapse just to crush what is left of my heart today. 

But I can hear his voice in my head telling me it'll all be ok. I feel his arms so tight around my waist, & his steady breath on my shoulder. His fingers through my hair & his heart beating in time with mine. 

Today I am a little broken, and he's taken a piece of me with him. 

I'm chipped, 

and scattered. 

I am tired 

& I am grateful. 

But mostly, I am ok.